Audiobook DJ

The Echo of One Hand Clapping: Notes on Audio Publishing and Production, by Brian Price

For the past few weeks it has been the end of the marching band season here in Indiana:  Quarter finals, semi finals, final finals.  My daughter came home despondent.  Her band, the Fighting Quakers of Plainfield, had come in number eleven out of 21.  Only ten bands make it to state.

“The judges didn’t know what they were talking about,” she said. 

And I thought.  I’ve been a judge in a lot of artistic competitions and I think she is probably right.  We don’t know what we’re talking about.  After all – it’s art.

I’ve just received a list of judging criteria from the next round of competitions I’m judging for.  They use words like merit, professional, positive, appropriate, and, my favorite—applicable.  All these words are very happy and helpful words except when it comes to actually listening to a pile of audiobooks that were written by different writers, read by different readers and, most importantly, most likely the books were produced with very different audiences, goals and intents in mind.

The problem with artistic competitions is that they’re not races or games.  Nobody lines the runners up in a row, shoots off a starting gun and cheers for the audiobook who gets across the line first. 

I sometimes wish there were compulsories for audio listening like in Olympic ice-skating.  The narrator would be required to perform certain feats during his or her reading: Correctly pronouncing the word mirror in a Southern accent, cracking one’s knuckles between chapters and doing a triple axle spin while performing a prepositional phrase.

Of course, a major difference between audiobooks and a lot of performing arts is that the whole idea of audiobooks is subtly, that if the producer and narrator do their jobs perfectly the listener might not even notice, being outstanding by not standing out.  

Audiobooks practice the high arts of synthesis and collaboration.

Not that certain artists don’t stand out.  Like the New York Yankees, like Martina Natratilova, like Stephen King narrators like Jim Dale, Scott Brick and Barbara Rosenblat work at such a high level so much of the time and on so many projects that they are always being handed awards.  Don’t get me wrong, I’d listen to Barbara Rosenblat read the phone book, but I can’t imagine what the inside of her house must look like—plaques hanging on the walls, trophies on mantle piece, boxes of Audies and Earphone awards in the corners.  What can she possible do with them all? 

I like being a judge for audio awards.  I appreciate hearing a vast array of titles I wouldn’t hear otherwise.  I try to be conscientious.  I try to be balanced.  I try to be critical and fair.  But in the end, awards, especially awards in the arts are just some people’s opinions.  They’re not fair.   Art isn’t fair.  Art is about life. 

Life isn’t fair.  Ask my daughter.  That’s the reason when it comes to how well her marching band did in the finals—they always come in first in my book.

Brian Price
920 Creekside Lane
Plainfield, IN  46168
317/203-5044
check out:  http://www.greatnorthernaudio.com